How to Write a Love Letter

by Susie Bright

If You Are Already Lovers

1. 1. Tell your lover, in detail, what you want to do to them
2. 2. Remind your lover, in detail, what the two of you did the last time you were in bed
3. 3. Describe your lover's body like you just saw it for the very first time
4. 4. Talk about how hard/wet/frustrated you are writing this letter

If You Are Not Yet Lovers, but More Than Acquaintances

1. 1. Make an intimate observation
2. 2. Tell a secret about yourself
3. 3. Talk about how hard/wet/frustrated you are writing this fucking letter
4. 4. Don't chicken out! Send it

The Three Best Love Letters I Ever Got

I got out all these letters and read them again before I wrote them down. It occurred to me that all of them have elements of frustrated longing, and sadness--that was the tragic part and the hot part all at the same time.
 

1. My 18 year old boyfriend was in boot camp. He sent me a piece of paper with nothing on it but his name, a heart, and his dried semen crinkling up the page.
3. My married lover had just signed a new "relationship contract" with his wife, promising to end their non-monogamous open agreement, and to never see me or touch me again. He wrote me a letter about how every day at work and all night, all he could do was think about me and my pussy and how he was going to go crazy if he couldn't fuck me again.
5. My girlfriend left the country and a trail of tears behind her. A year later, on my birthday, which she had never remembered before, I got a postcard from her, in Spanish. I nearly tore my dictionary apart trying to translate it. Half way through I realized, it wasn't her words, it was Roy Orbison:

"In dreams I talk with you
In dreams you're mine
All of the time with you
Ever in dreams, in dreams"